Receiving compliments are really akin to receiving emotional flowers that cloud your mind with their fragrance. - Quoted from Chia De Zhong

Today my teacher complimented me on my consoling =D

It all happened yesterday night, at 11.30pm, when a friend, X, contacted me for someone to talk to. X's down with lots of problems. X's dad was only known to have quit his job (though i suspect he got fired), grandma just passed away, and not long ago X parents had conflicts. At such a young age of not even 14 years old, X had been through a lot. X has sort of family violence as much as I heard.

So X was afraid to view the corpse, as most young people do, but this was the 4th. Digging further I found out X had a 3 months trauma after the first viewing. So I actually consoled her throughout the night.

So I said to X that everyone goes through that, look at it this way , the moment we are born into the world, we’re preparing for this day, thus we live our lifes to the fullest, to leave no regrets, old age is more peaceful than reservoir, and its not sinful, wad matters now is the legacy she left behind and the beautiful memories left engraved in ur minds, be optimistic, the place afterlife should be less harsh than Earth

Then, unsure what to say I gave X my opinions and views of death viewing. I said that as we see the corpse, we should feel calm, like a feeling that he/she was at peace, and that would give us some sort of power to continue living, and take up what was left behind for us, the continuity.

Then, remembering the movie, "Departures", I told X that we shouldn’t mourn, for its not a bad thing. Some people even smiled at ease, that the person has went back where we belong, joining loved ones there, away from cruel world. Some laughed, as they see no reason to cry over spilled milk, and lots of other ways to cope with it.

And I continued by tellign X that X's trauma was probably due to lack of mediums to express feelings, it is perfectly fine and encouraged that X talk about it after the event, and share with ur family n closed ones to exchange thoughts about it. One sure thing is that during the viewing, no matter what, we should keep in mind that by viewing it it made the whole event real, and bear in mind, its all part of life cycle. Being real means like the person dont just vanish out of the sudden to nowhere. Viewing the corpse should let us feel that that portion of life is complete, and fulfilled, that the peace look would remind us of the happy memories left behind.

Then X told me about having the image stuck in X's head, so i explained that it means they had succeeded having great positive impact on ur life, and its rather good, cuz it helps u to keep the memories alive rather than suppressing it, since memories do fade. So I suggested when closing ur eyes, associate, link the happy memories of them with their peaceful faces, don’t u find a sense of bliss that u had been through such happy times? Those memories are uniquely urs n theirs, no others!

So this was about it, then my teacher actually told me to distract X from viewing instead, by focus on random stuffs. So that got me worried and I smsed X again to 'change strategy'. However she had looked at it. But today I received a good news that X is not afraid anymore during the funeral. Which I hope X is speaking the truth, and not telling a white lie just so that I would be at ease. X went on matured-ly, trying to solve the rest of X family problem.

This was again one small part where envy steps in, though its painful, I do envy young people who went through so much in their early stages of life, yet able to cope and have lots of supports. These people would turn out stronger, just as the chinese saying 吃得苦中苦，方為人上人.

Well, this is a rather big success, since frankly I lied (white lie) about my personal encounter with corpse viewing. I didnt actually had much emotions attached, thus obviously didnt have those dramatic feelings and 'understandings' of viewing. I based all these on the passing of my relative's grandma, which I had observed their reaction, and their laughter after the event. They had completely accepted it and are optimistic about going on with life. However, I still do not understand myself, just like a scene in departures as well, why would people laugh as they see the corpse? As in laugh of serenity, not sinister smirk, grudg-ous grins, sly smiles.... and that sort of things, but sincere bliss, which filled with warmth and serenity. Perhaps should check out with professionals.

Alright, another 2 days of full schedule, 3h of sleep. zzz... nites..... oh btw today had a great dinner thanks to Auntie Jacq~! =D