So, the year is ending.
Time flies, literally.
What have I learnt this year?
I got back on the ground shortly after July,
to receive some negative feedback,
a week streak of it.
For some reason, the more I rectify,
the lousier I fair,
and just at this moment,
a headhunter came.
An established company,
Looking for someone who is young,
have a tourist guide badge,
able to do tour leading overseas,
have experience in conducting/facilitating,
have passion on enrichment.
Sounds a perfect match!
And thus the dilemma.
One of the loooongest dilemma I ever had.
But all these is settled through a very interesting way.
I actually went for tarot reading, so scary the accuracy...
Among all the 78 cards, choose 10, and place in a certain order,
then each card represents something,
my first card was "lovers", it's not bgr but a dilemma between "jobs", which is true cuz of the job offer,
of all the cards the 10 I chosen are swords and wands, a few cups only,
some talked about current "traps" and about "burden" that comes from myself, and supports of "knights" from people around,
future is tough with conflicts and competitors await but the "ship" will come in soon, means fruits of labour coming,
talking about purpose, my purpose has been fulfilled as of now and its time I strive for bigger things,
subconsciously something else is bothering me but no idea what, but this thing will cause drastic sudden change one day and will cause either huge conflict or huge embarrassment however its a pathway to something better, which cant decipher is what,
but do not accept "noises" that may seems lucrative but full of greater struggles that may "bind" me down, but to hold on, again true. Then there's something about "teaching" which is random but that I should look into.
Lastly, message from "Angel" is Magdaline, which something along the line of "Do not worry what others think or say", but believe in "your worth".
Cool eh? So I decided to stay? Maybe its just dog year?
It was the right decision.
I would say that now we are more stable,
And I started to let go all my burdens and worry,
and simply focus on guiding,
I found more peace.
So I began reading books............
I started with "Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck".
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ART OF NOT GIVING A FUCK
MAIN THEME - EMBRACE THE UNCOMFORTABLE
The more you pursue "feeling better", the less satisfied you become as it reinforces the fact that you lack it in the first place.
We should instead evaluate the "feel bad" part of life and change our perception.
PURSUE NEGATIVITY INSTEAD
Overcoming shortcoming leads to growth.
Suffering is inevitable.
Don't ask "what do you want in life?"
Ask yourself "what would you be willing to suffer for?"
Do not wish for a stagnant life
Ask yourself "why am I suffering, for what purpose?"
Some negativity is essential for breakthrough.
"Our most radical changes in perspective happen at the tail end of our worst moments"
ACCEPTANCE
Do not just focus on your strengths.
Do not compare with others
Accepts your flaw, how do you view it?
Do not fall into "Entitlement"
NEVER view yourself as an underdog or unappreciated potential or undiscovered genius.
Thats why the question I always wonder.........
What's the fuss of all these "Regardless of Race, Language, Religion" madness and class divide.
To be honest I find a lot of people started to blame our government for every thing that dont go smoothly, it's spoon feeding to the extreme. Yes classification exists, so that things can be done more efficiently, what's so bad about yardstick, it provides aims and goals and allows breakthroughs to happen.
Some are 生不由己
Some are 井底之蛙
Some just 蒙在鼓里
Some are 落井下石
Ultimately is we are a generation brought up by a generation on Singapore economic development era, they been through the hardship, the emphasis on academic excellence, so we became kiasu we became elitist, its also not their fault, its sociology over time.....
More importantly then, why are we so affected by classification, so affected by inquality, so affected by labelling? Its is ultimately "us", ourselves.....
OWNERSHIP
Do not ask "why is this happening to me"
Ask "Okay I screw up, how can I improve?"
Taking Reponsibility is not Taking Blame
CHALLENGE
Certainity is the enemy Growth.
Do not search for Certainty.
Search for Doubts. Be Skeptics.
Being Wrong opens by the possibility of Change and thus Opportunity for Growth.
GOALS
Commitment, focus on few quality goals and recognise that it ties you down to remove your FOMO and there's then no need to chase for more goals. Remember time is finite so act on your goals fast. Bigger goals need to be broken down in pieces of the jigsaw to let you take the first step.
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So then shortly after, I started reading into Ikigai. Turns out Ikigai of Work is too myopic. It is only one small portion of the pie. I actually finished this book as I was coaching a junior on his maths. This boy is a gem, at Sec 2, he has achieved maturity more than his peers. He understands moderation, he understands consequences, understands gratitude and very advanced thinking for his age. To spur his motivation first by passing maths and eventually ace-ing them, he moved on to critical thinking and developing a very balanced world view.
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IKIGAI - A COMPREHENSIVE ANALYSIS
WHAT IS IKIGAI ?
Loosely translated from "Ikigai" (life, worth), it suggest the value of life. But ikigai exist in 2 domains, the "Jinsei" (lifetime) and the "Seikatsu" (daily life).
Ikigai is about Finding Happiness :
Shiawase / Kofuku : happy state
Ikigai : looking towards the future by enjoying the present
Action : what steps what suffering what small arduous yet you can see past it as a task but a small portion of happiness from your desired goal
Living the moment : keep life busy
Ikigai : attention to details even on idle
Ikigai is to achieve Consistent Joy
Ikigai is to recognise the ephemeral of joy
Hakanasa : frail transient momentary
Eg Cherry Blossoms
Hanami : gather under cherry blossom, enjoying the moment as it is, that would not be the same at any other point of time
IKIGAI DEFINED
Everyday Life > Lifetime
External World > Internal World (link)
Giving > Receiving
Fluid > Fixed (change/progress)
Emotional > Logical
Specific > Abstract (tangible)
Ikigai leads to :
Intrinsic Happiness
Blissful State of Mind
Control over Emotions
Purpose of Life
Vitality of Living
IKIGAI AT WORK
How much autonomy? How much motivation? How can I achieve job?
Do we possess a grateful heart?
What tasks am I doing? Are we focused on big things or small? Are we affecting perception with history or living the moment?
How do I feel when doing a task? How am I spending time? And what joy am I enjoying or expecting?
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So then I started to become very obsessed to the "now" moment. I started to take every moment as it is, of every ephemeral state. I started to guide as if I am not gonna guide anymore, I started to focus on people, on delivering the best of every moment, I started to lose purpose, I find my motivation in that every moment of my life whether on the job, on meeting people, or roaming the streets. Then it came............ PURPOSE !!
So now, I enrolled myself to driving,
I aim to get financial capability to start funding for Sign Language class,
I would want to one day get a part time entertainer as a Magician too.
That is at least by the end of next year.
Nowadays this song keeps appearing in my life,
In sheng shong, in ice cream uncles, in radio, in barber.......
But now that I listened to the lyrics, WOW!
Long ago I thought about the lyrics being a "Singapore Dream",
Perhaps because Xinyao songs are written in the era,
where SG is going through economic developments,
so lots of material pursue and hardships,
thus the "Whisper of a Commoner"
I now have enough financial capability to fund my lifestyle,
I am working towards achieving median soon,
Yet I have the flexibility of time,
And able to find meaningful things to fill my void,
I have great friends, good company, good work, good parents,
good boss, good colleagues, good lifestyle, good health,
I guess I am the most blessed person in Singapore!!
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小人物的心声
WHISPER OF A COMMONER
也许我一个人
不能成就一番大事业
但我尽力贡献一份微薄的力量
Maybe I alone,
Cannot achiever greatness,
But I will give my contribution with my limited power.
也许我自己
不能发出万丈光和亮
但我能为斗室带来足够的光芒
Maybe I alone,
Could not be the one in the limelight, cant radiate for society,
But I think my dim flame is enough to fill a small room.
我从来都不在乎
自己不是一个大人物
因为平凡也是一种幸福
I never actually care,
To be a great influence of the world,
Because being a commoner is a form of blessing.
看到名人总是忙忙碌碌
我的时间由我控制
平凡日子一样会充实
Seeing great people being always so busy,
But my time is within my means,
Being a commoner can be fruitful and satisfying too.
