Today cleaned the storeroom again, second time, omg looking at how the white cloth metamorphosed into a grey cloth really made me guilty about it. Each wipe with it meant a gash on my conscience, though there's a momentary sense of achievement to clean the object, but generally this farrago of feeling is an unbearable cocktail which I had swallow. Anyway that was foreshadowing the skies today, that it drenched me to my tuition class. Before that was killing time at the library reading a book or filial piety. Great verse I found:

树欲静而风不止，子欲孝而亲不待

Time waits for no man, not only for work, for trip, for success, but for him to repay a huge debt that is supposed to be easy to clear. "I will work hard for my parents to travel around the world, to have big house and big car and big wealth!" but when that time comes, will they still need them? Will they still want them?

Parents take their children successes and failures personally as they live vicariously through children, therefore a second mistake we made is a big issue to them since they had gone through the walks of life, even if it might be a brand new experience to us. After all, they had lived to see us surpass them in all aspects.

Yet when they had completed their mission, their only wish is companion of their children although they often had a ready mindset of not getting back their well deserved compensation. So as children of the epitome of goddess, could we just surrender to filial piety when we still have the time to tend to the magnanimous parents?

A few stories are especially explicit in bringing out the warmth of home.

First is the chinese new year message advertisement where a bunch of aunties were bragging about their successful children (in overseas to pursuit their carreer) while playing mahjong, only one of them didnt utter a word. In the end a car drove by and found out to be the family of that auntie, and the short clip ended with a silent mahjong table as a sense of emptiness had oozed out from their hearts - a hole too big to be covered with tangible possessions.

Then is the song 'fragrant rice' (dao xiang) by jay chou. The song is filled with a rustic atmosphere and the sound of nature pulled us back to the 'home sweet home' times. I personally feel that the verse '童年的纸飞机现在终於飞回我手里' is so beautiful. Paper planes are often suggesting dreams of a young kid, and these planes are thrust into the air, and would swirl with grace, danced and glided, before it is pulled down by the earthly laws. This is also reinforced in the phrase '追蜻蜓追到累了' as reference to 'Red Dragonfly' (hong qing ting), a song speaking of childhood. Ofcoz, my favourite verse is '珍惜一切就算没有拥有'. I had explained this lone time ago, basically treasure variety and diversity, as well as quality because the bad will bring out the good, just like you can make a line seemed longer without touching it by drawing a shorter one beside.

Last is ofcoz Devoted Son by Anita Desai, the protagonist was a too-good-to-be-true man where he had heed his parents words rigidly to the point that although he was a successful doctor in a prestigious hospital in US because he won scholarship for topping the nation, he seemed to be comfortable going back to his own town and tradition. Yet his parents were now nothing but burden to him, and conflict arouse as the father is suffocated by his son. His diet was all monitored and was treated like a patient instead of a father. I really sympathize with the father, this shows that a glamorous showcased being put up too long will cease to dazzle, eventually backfires, and that nothing in the world is perfect. So for parents, have some leeway for kids larh. It's good enough to have a harmonious home that broken bonds. 家和万事兴。

Well in a nutshell, humans do change, and humans arent perfect, so the 'burden' you would most willing to carry is ofcoz family, right? 家是我最甘心的负担

So being the parent also abit more understanding larh, speaking of this i remember a beautiful carved situation in anita desai's pineapple cake. The protagonist was trying to hold his mother's hand, yet was shocked to find that she had worn a glove, therefore he couldnt feel the flesh since separated by that thin layer of cloth. Worst thing is that the mother did not understand him and though he wanted to pee.

After such a long post, actually frankly i think my family is not harmonious and happy, yet family is like utensils and plate, they bound to clash when you're eating, cling, clang, phiang. So appreciate what I have as there are others who do not have such privilege.