As society advances, everything is so fast paced. Emotions, problems, projects, work, school, money, everything is constantly and seamlessly changing. I felt that I think being always on the fast lane, having so much activities and new experiences, I often expect too much.

This morning for wushu, I came up with another game, similar to chess, to place the tatami in a chess format, and have both teams on each sides, and each team were to move one player one adjacent tiles at a time. When they face-off, they will PK horse stance. Then, the losers are supposed to be doing extra physical movements as a "disadvantage" that was to be stacked, but due to their physical level we scraped that. Actually Im rather surprised they are able to last such a long time doing the horse stance. 

So then Jo casually asked, why do we always come up with new games and not replay the old ones. I thought for awhile, yea, it didnt really come to me that we can reuse games, I was always thinking of new games. It's personally I guess, always seeking for new exposure. 

Well, again I see the bonds of the Jr, Im really really really glad.

So then, after a shag day, luckily it rained and I got to rest my body. 

Then I came across this taboo app called "Bang Your Friends". Im like what in the world?! Why would such app even exist. This really grows the desperation of people nowadays, and the derogating sex norms. 

Then I skimmed through a few "What would you do" videos, and felt that luckily I think humanity still exist. It's always great to see people standing up for one another, but again there are topics raised that are really complicated and rather controversial. Again, I just think that humans have to have more understanding of one another, to see beyond their actions, to their culture, upbringing, experiences, geographical locations, belief and personality. 

Then, I was looking through personality disorder and I thought I fall into mild Histrionic Personality Disorder.  Somehow I have the constant feeling of wanting to distant myself with the world, yet at the same time possesses some kind of unbearable form of loneliness, but I consider myself very social-able and outspoken which shouldn't have this problem and then fighting a constant battle whether or not to initiate or to let the other party initiate cuz of the "effort" and "worthiness" measures. Maybe, Im anti social too as many of my social network are hermits too, like me. Hmmm. Then most hermits are really frog in well, I get the benefit of exploring the world, so I would always like to share the world I see, but that would lead me to not be able to find someone that would be outgoing, understanding, full of wisdom, yet loyal, trusting, and fun-loving. 

And lately I have been very restless to do anything still. Burnout, but over nothing. Why?

Then as CNY and Valentines is approaching, kindda wondering what would I be doing, how memorable would it be, how happy should I feel. The channel 8 show showed a guy alone on CNY eve, really feel sad for him, yet also, I thought of those ppl who have no kins on reach, or still have to work, or abandoned, they have no problem going through it, mostly also that they have a group that they belong with that substitute the sense of belonging of family and spouse. This really proves how accurate is Maslow. I really loved to see a big big family of 10 on one table feasting, and none on phone or any other gadgets. I remembered how angry I was at the second CNY at JL house when most of the people are fixed on gadgets. 

Then I thought of child rearing. I mean like, I would like to train my child to not be afraid of asking, but it might spoil him, but if dont ask, will be shy, so have to ask and yet if the person said no have to dont feel hurt, but that would make him easily con-ed. Sigh. Also, i would like him to seek for opportunities by only providing minimal pocket money, that he have to complete task to bargain for more, but that would make him no empathy, and money minded, if pocket money, too reliant and too "employee" like. Then, I would like my child to able to be open with me, to update me about everything even though I wont do anything unless he asked for advice. But then who would actually do that? Sigh.