Today went training late, then played some games and had lunch before going up to tai house. Francis was here this time, he was jamming with sin5, felt very relaxing and enjoyable though I was not in there haha. On one hand really glad to see them playing happily and had such great times, yet on the other hand self-pity got no music talent, like ting sheng zj, but his excuse was that the world is fair since he is already good in a few area, must have some bad... but what's my specialty? Im not even a jack-of-all-trades.

Then went with Jo to cut his hair, met my mum at tm for her new hp and dinner.
Had a feeling somehow some reason, I think I had changed. I couldnt feel the happiness I have been feeling the past few years. My life... 50% of it is music, is ktv, and it was that reason I met few of my close friends, cheuck and wlwx, but now ktv seems to be a monster, a horror, a hideous thing, like voldermolt, never to be mentioned in front of me. All I get was 'oh no no why did you say that word!' or 'dont want go, go yourself', or 'oh no there comes the horrible singing'... sigh.. guess im really a pariah.

I labelled someone a coward because he locked himself at home because he felt betrayed by his 'friends', then I thought it was deserved because he didnt dare to find other social circle, but now, I almost have to label myself similarly too.

I think it's time for me to find new social circle. Hope that through minds and poly I could find a suitable social circle for my current personality, or I would just put up a front and lock myself at home too =)Somehow, my current social circle seemed to be drifting apart, not really, only me drifting, but yea, I got sudden sensitivity to some words, though they admit they were being guailan, which made them not guailan, but yea, i dont think i wanna brace another few of those anymore. Sincerely gratful for all the happy memories shared, relationship is hard to part, same as memories, but humans are hard to grasp, eventually there will be farewells, except this is not farewell, just that i might not be able to devote as much time as i used to be, but i truly appreciate that few portions of my life =) =(